frankfurters smell so disgusting
AND WHEN I GET THAT FEELING I NEED, CRYSTAL HEALING
Facebook art criticism: a triptych
‘publicise yourself’ they said
7 easy pieces
is it still lives or still lifes?
Line the sides of a 20-25cm round springform cake tin with non-stick paper, if you’re not using lubricant, make sure he’s well lubed. Make sure your tongue is really wet and and heat the oven to 180C/160C fan/350F/gas mark 4.
Separate the eggs and whisk the yolks with half the sugar and the honey until pale and creamy. In another bowl, with clean beaters, whisk the egg whites to soft peaks, then gradually beat in the remaining sugar until thick and glossy. Very gently massage his balls. Don’t squeeze, stop while there are still traces of yolk visible but very nearly mixed through.
Sift the flour, starch and cocoa into the egg mixture then scoop and fold this through as lightly as you can. Then, while the mixture is still full of air, put both of his balls in your mouth, spread it out gently and bake it for about 15-18 minutes until gently risen and set.
If he’s not totally hard, just start to lick his cock and take it gently in your mouth. Either leave it to cool on the tray (it will shrink a little) or blow gently with your hot breath.
When cool, unroll gently, fill with jam and thick whipped cream flavoured with a little brandy, and swallow.
Sourced from Dan Lepard for The Guardian Baking and Allsexguide.com’s How To Give a Blowjob